Okay, gang - I like to call you gang because it has that fruity-phony sound to it that makes me feel I'm doing a better job of emulating my idol, whom I got it from - some good news about our next View From the Hood of Your Car meetup.
As you'll remember, an unfortunate event precipitated by but not the fault of Reader M. left the Blue Rhino butane refill stand unusable as a VFTHOYC meetup spot. But Blue Rhino's loss has proved to be our gain.
Our destination this time is a spectacular tropical resort which lies in a lovely South American country abutting Venezuela and Brazil in which - how convenient is this - English is the official language.
Not only will it be a VFTHOYC meetup, but much, much more. There will be seminars and panel discussions covering every aspect of a book I got at a garage sale, including Orv and the Mystery, Biceps Beach, Ann and the possum, the China-Nepal-Bali triangle, and the Fountain man. Not to mention endless opportunities to pre-order my proposed book on certain multi-level marketing opportunities in newly emerging nations. And something new I'd like to explore, which for now I'm calling the Crank Option.
When you order your tickets - they're a flat $100, by the way - be sure to give our operators your full credit card number, expiration date, and that little 3-digit security code on the back.
For the finale Saturday night, we'll be having a special feast featuring several different types of the local seafood carefully prepared in the traditional native manner, all washed down with an absolutely wonderful tropical fruit drink, the specialty of the resort, which I'm told is to die for. Because my doctor has just recently told me to temporarily avoid wonderful tropical fruit drinks I won't be having any myself, but that just means more for everybody else, right?
Our spectacular tropical meetup will be held Friday evening, June 6, 2014 through Sunday morning, June 8, 2014, or maybe earlier, depending.
Again, be sure our operators have your full credit card information on record in advance, number, expiration date, and that little 3-digit security code on the back.
LOL! So what immortal morsel of dreherrhea does this refer to?
ReplyDelete[NFK: Diane, I like to think of this as a gestalt, as one of his favored commenters and stalking ponies likes to misuse the term. - KH]
Delete[NFK: Diane's question reminds me: it's high time I had my own minions, so that I can establish my own Minion Awards and so tempt more and more readers and commenters to compete for my favor, hoping I will bestow one upon them.
ReplyDeleteThe qualifications to become my Minion are either, first, you must be slavishly loyal to me even beyond the point where I routinely use the things most sacred to you as my urinal, and/or, second, you must appear to have smoked marijuana heavily for most of your life while seeing no reason why a quote from a popular TV show or science fiction book or an endlessly repeated anecdote from your family history shouldn't carry the same weight as a reasoned argument.
If you think you qualify, apply today. - KH]
Can't wait for the meetup!!
ReplyDeleteI invited my congressman, but he won't be able to get there until later, and he said he has to try to leave before the final feast. Hope that's OK!
[NFK: No one leaves before the final feast.
DeleteDo you happen to have his credit card information? - KH]
If he doesn't get the info to you, you can just send someone to "see him off" at the airstrip before he leaves.
Delete[NFK: Great news! Today we passed the halfway mark in advance ticket sales for our tropical meetup: three of the six tickets we had committed to having printed up in advance have already been sold. If we sell out with enough time to spare before June, we’ll have to decide whether or not to print more tickets. If we do, though, our denominator will obviously get bigger, making our percentage sold drop accordingly, so we're gonna hold off on that until we have to.
ReplyDeleteAlso, there’s a lot of oil exploration going on near the resort right now, making it appeare the shortage of rooms is a direct result of our meetup and thus psychologically driving your urge to pull the trigger on that credit card even more intensely. Sweet!
For any of you intrigued about the math I'm using, let me point you to the master himself.
Again, be sure our operators have your full credit card information on record in advance, number, expiration date, and that little 3-digit security code on the back. - KH]
Amex cards have 4-digit security on the front. Just sayin'.
ReplyDelete