Thursday, October 16, 2014

Hail, hail, the gang's all here!

Can you smell the desperation? "Jerry Springer hits the road for Democratic Ohio candidate" reads the title. Drag out Jerry Springer to whip the crowd up into a frenzy to vote for Ed FitzGerald and the Democrats!

Oh, wait—sorry... misleading headline. Springer isn't joining the FitzGerald campaign. He's joining the Nina Turner campaign. Springer knows a loser when he sees one, no doubt, and Turner does have a chance against Husted.

Springer has given at least $12,000 to gubernatorial candidate Ed FitzGerald, $10,000 to attorney general candidate David Pepper, and $5,000 to treasurer candidate Connie Pillich, according to state campaign finance reports this year. He also gave the state Democratic party at least $28,000.

Most of the time Jerry Springer is making money from showcasing losers rather than losing money to a loser. But $12,000.00 is probably pocket change. Springer is reportedly worth $45 million.

Springer said he attracts potential voters who don't typically attend political events. "Certainly not the blue bloods," he said, but more of a "working-class kind of audience."

I guess working class kind of folks can relate to people who can pony up $45,000.00 in political donations. For some reason.

The host of "The Jerry Springer Show" now lives in Sarasota, Florida, though he spent half his life in Ohio. He travels to Connecticut where he tapes episodes that feature bleeped-out obscenities, guests in fisticuffs and a studio audience chanting his name. (Recent titles include "I Slept With Your Twin & Your Mom" and "Stay With Me Or Else.")

We should qualify terms. Most of the working class people I know are decent people who vote Republican—sometimes begrudgingly—because the alternative is to support the ideology and lifestyles of pimps like Jerry Springer and philandering liars like Ed FitzGerald.

A spokesman for the Ohio Republican Party said Springer's appearance illustrates the size of FitzGerald's problems and hurts the Democratic ticket.

"Now voters associate the Democratic Party with two people: Ed FitzGerald & Jerry Springer," said GOP spokesman Chris Schrimpf in an email. "Maybe Ed can go on Jerry's show after the election and explain how not to run a campaign."

The question is whether Jerry Springer would ever let anyone he had the least bit of respect for to be on his show. Yes; this includes himself.

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