Tuesday, June 18, 2013

View from my Desk Chair

Working lunch today, people. And now I'm blogging during my digestion time. Isn't that efficient of me?



The sandwich is sliced ham and orangish-yellow cheese and green lettuce on some kind of wheat bread. The tiniest bit of mayonnaise topped it off. (Warning: you might vomit if you read that link with a full stomach.)

The yogurt is Oikos brand Greek Yogurt with some type of fruit flavor. The color was orange so I think the flavor was as well.

Topped off with a Lake Erie Highball on the rocks.

So... what are all y'all eating? Keith, I'm hoping nothing strange has flown into your mouth recently, no antelope heart tartare or perhaps Iron Man's kneecap?

17 comments:

  1. I should point out that I've been informed that the plate has a Lazy Daisy pattern.

    Mothers-in-law are not completely useless.

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  2. I find it so comforting that the lettuce is green.

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  3. Pauli, I'm concerned.

    Was the yogurt harvested locally from organic oiks?

    Keith

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    1. I don't know, but we'll know tomorrow when I examine my morning stool.

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    2. "Morning Stool: The Convoluted Journey of Rod Dreher's Thinking on a Market Basket of Unrelated and Incongruous Subjects, Including Long, Irritating Secondary Titles That Only Dissipate Any Interest You Ever Might Have Had in the Main Title"

      As a public figure, and no court of law would accept that he above all people has worked overtime to make himself and his family anything but private citizens, the opportunities for him to become a choice target of public examination, parody, satire, ridicule, and unauthorized biography are legally far richer than for the ordinary private citizen.

      Any professional writers in the house? I hear professional E-book publishing can be dirt cheap.

      Keith

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  4. Hey, y'all...didn't Jonathan C. mention that some Hollywood dude was thinking of optioning (is that the word?) movie rights for LWORF? I think they should do a made-for-TV movie like Christmas Shoes. Have y'all ever seen Christmas Shoes? My sadistic kids made me watch it a few years ago. Hell must consist of having to watch Christmas Shoes over and over again.

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    Replies
    1. LWORL is a natural for the Hallmark Channel. I can't imagine it anywhere else.

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    2. Oops, just realized that the movie deal has been discussed extensively on this blog already, I am so discombobulated these days...sorry!

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  5. This Wednesday on The Hallmark Channel...

    3:00 AM Eastern (2:00 AM Central)

    Schlock and Awe: The Story of a Man Telling the Story of a Woman Who Couldn't Stop Him From Doing So Because She Died Before She Could

    Next up at 4:00 AM (3:00 AM) Central)

    Noted child psychologist Dr. Willow Branch discusses how to talk with your children about their favorite pet's suicide from fear and loathing-induced anxiety.

    Keith

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    1. Keith, are you suggesting that the Dreher chicken reached his limit and threw himself in the path of the neighborhood cat?

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    2. Well, Kathleen, if I found myself trapped in a life with this guy wondering what he planned to do to me after he'd hunted down and watched a few loops of these guys, I believe I might just pucker up my little chicken port and take a swan dive into Tigger's jaws instead, too.

      Keith

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    3. Wow. Apparently Dreher's "South" is very very VERY gay. As a northerner, I'll just have to take his word for it.

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    4. Kathleen, on a more serious note, I think it's more a dog whistle to Dreher's base, particularly some of the old timers he's courting with his new local political aspirations.

      Here Dreher piously bemoans racism in his parish as the noble, pensive (if you don't believe me, just check his picture; pictures never lie), grizzled veteran journalistic voice of the "Bonnie Blue", the literati term only he seems to use.

      Here, though, Dreher throws his fans another bone, giving his readers another amusing look at Southern blacks. On those rare occasions Dreher refers to black people in his writings, they're either drag queens, these prancers, or sort of retarded students who would have never made it without Ruthie.

      This is entirely consistent with Dreher's life-long stance as an American Yorkshire in a wig and a smoking jacket. Underneath his glib rhetorical veneer, congenital vulgarian Dreher hasn't really wandered very far from the snufflers Mencken celebrates here.

      But at the end of the day I kinda wonder if any of Dreher's racist tendencies are really racist, or if they are just different expressions of a basic resentment of a world that refuses to appreciate and love him from that chubby, defiantly inappropriate and permanently arrested little Starhill boy who continues to age without ever maturing.

      Keith

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    5. LOL!

      I've been assuming that Bonnie Blue refers to Rhett's and Scarlett's little daughter from Gone with the Wind -- you know, the cute little tyke who dies tragically, thereby driving yet another emotional wedge between R and S...?

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    6. No the Bonnie Blue refers to the flag of the Republic of West Florida which West Feliciana Parish was part of at one time. Dreher blogged about that some time after he moved back there and read one of the local websites. It was also one of the early flags of the Confederacy. So when you see a grown man wearing a white sheet, is he a cultured, historically steeped individual just acting out Julius Caesar or is he a Klansman? You decide. I can't quite hear those high frequencies the dogs can.

      Let's also not forget that the celebrated founder of the Walker Percy Festival (aka CorkyFest) himself generally disdains reading fiction. His preferred reading is more or less half way through whatever sociologist seems to support his brain fart of the moment, at least until his permanently adolescent attention span fails him.

      If you compare what Dreher says to what he actually does, it's hard not to conclude he's not much more than a human Potemkin cultural village, a cardboard kiosk of fake book bindings tottering around on its hind trotters but leaving an unmistakeable trail of half-eaten slops and moist pellets behind everywhere it goes.

      Keith

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  6. That yogurt is not really Greek. Let's have a little more authenticity next time, Pauli.

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