Sunday, January 11, 2009

More Reactions from Rod Dreher's Dance on Father Neuhaus's Grave

Roland de Chanson made this comment on the original post, date-stamped January 9, 2009 10:32 PM:

Rod,

You have deleted posts by authors whose kind words I acknowledged in my reply. I must therefore look like a fool in replying to comments ostensibly never made. I acknowledge your right to censor any and all respondents to your blog, but I am dismayed that you would delete posts from a person or persons (whom I in any event do not know either by name or reputation) which are neither scurrilous nor defamatory nor even mildly provocative and even in some cases quite amusing.

If you wish to delete my posts as well, please do not feel constrained in so doing. I enjoy reading your articles here and in DMN and I agree with you more often than not, but in this instance I am afraid you have transgressed the bounds not only of civilised propriety but also of Christian charity, in that you have profaned the obsequies (pokhorony) of Fr. Neuhaus for your own picayune vindication. You are hardly a nonentity; you ought to have enough confidence in your own integrity and reputation that you might eventually be proven more correct in your assessment of the scandal than Fr. Neuhaus, if indeed history ultimately justifies you. All things in the fullness of time.

As one born a Catholic, I have nothing but the utmost reverence for those who find their way to Rome, given the intellectual and spiritual obstacles history has thrust into the path of conversion. And I was greatly moved by the story of your own conversion. I cannot disagree with your sense of betrayal and disgust during the heyday of the homosexual scandal. But, as I know you are well read in history, I found it preposterous that you abandoned your religion because of the failings of mere men. As I have written here several times before, I love the Byzantine churches, both Orthodox and Uniat, and have been overwhelmed with the transcendence of their liturgies, yet, despite my contempt for the perpetrators and facilitators of the scandal, I cannot think that a sufficient reason for apostasy.

Censor me too if you wish. But, from a bad Catholic to a bad Orthodox, let us hope we both learn a bit of the charity of Christ.

Rod's response to this: "....I don't think it would be fair or accurate to judge John Paul II's papacy (for example) by his failure to govern the Church well. The man was, in my view, a saint, and his greatness is assured. And yet, the way he handled, or mishandled, the sexual abuse crisis was part of who he was, and showed his humanity." In other words, even saints need journalists to interpret their lives properly for the faithful. As for plain old Catholic clergymen, who better to moonlight as all-around advocatus diaboli than Mr. Part-time-chicken-farmer himself, our Working Boy!

Here's another thoughtful comment from "Disappointed Reader":

Since discovering your book and blog several years ago, I have been a devoted reader and fan, but the handling of Fr. Neuhaus’s death on these pages has me questioning whether I should continue to read and recommend your writings.

As someone who is not just a blogger but also a journalist, don’t you have an obligation to verify a derogatory story about a public figure? Perhaps before accusing someone in a public forum of bullying and censorship, you might send a simple email to check with your former boss and see if you had the facts straight?

As a reader this whole affair raises serious doubts in my mind about how much weight to give to your writing. If this is how you treat someone whom you claim to respect greatly and who hasn’t even been dead for a week, should I accept as fair and balanced your representations of those you disagree with?

I have read Fr. Neuhaus for years and while I disagreed with him on several issues, I felt his death as a real loss. Now added to that, I feel I might also need to stop reading a blog that has been a daily part of my life for a long time. Say what you will, your treatment of Fr. Neuhaus here strikes me as a failure of journalistic integrity, civility, and Christian charity. With those qualities called into question, I’m not sure why I should continue to read this blog.

Anyone want to attempt to convince D.R. to continue reading the crunchy blog? Bueller?

Alan Jacobs posted this at The American Scene, a Dreher-friendly mag for sure. It's basically a brief "common sense and manners 101" for folks who have forgotten about this and this:

But still, there is something that troubles me about Rod’s story. If someone has mistreated you, or done anything discreditable in your presence in private, and you wait until he is dead to tell the story in public, you’re ensuring that he doesn't get the opportunity to give his side of the story, to clarify or correct — and above all, to apologize and ask for forgiveness. He is forever, and publicly, the person who acted badly towards you; whereas if the story had been told while he was still alive, he could have been the person who repented and apologized for such behavior.


And last but not least, Simple Sinner's piece is a must-read. Excerpt:

In this swipe & smear piece where Dreher takes opportunity to further reflect on his hobby-horse - the priestly sex scandals… Well the hobby horse, ever inching its way across the blogosphere carpet, arrives just in time to rock across the as-yet unburied body of the very recently late and much beloved convert priest.

I hope the ratings are worth it.

From the above-linked post, Dreher tells us...

I tell you this story not to speak ill of Father Neuhaus,

...But then goes on to offer unverifiable (and now somewhat retracted) comments about interchanges that the now-dead priest can neither deny, affirm, corroborate or correct.

Had a priest of Neuhaus’s immense gifts and stature spoken out on behalf of Catholic victims and their families earlier, or at least not have stood up for them when he ought to have been calling them out, who knows how much good might have been done, and suffering might have been avoided?

If he had troubled to put himself in the position of Catholic mothers and fathers instead of the high-ranking churchmen who were his usual milieu, maybe it would have changed his views.

Gee, Rod, no incongruency at all in noting that you are not out to speak ill of the dead (before his body has been committed to the ground) before criticizing him in this highly emotive way.

Rod also makes mention of his deleting comments by our friend Diane, so maybe she could enlighten us about other reactions. Please bring to my attention any other reactions, especially those defending Dreher's remarks.

AFAIK, Mark Shea has not commented yet.

52 comments:

  1. "Please bring to my attention any other reactions, especially those defending Dreher's remarks."

    Oh, okay. well, i defended Dreher in the following remark that went something like this; "come on guys, you're being a little unfair. Rod waited a whole 9 1/2 hours after the man's passing to publish this post. It's not like the corpse was still warm..."

    Strangely, my defense of Dreher was deleted.

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  2. LOL. Roland also posted some sarcastic remarks, such as this one: "I think that Rod was well within his rights to reveal this incident involving Fr. Neuhaus. After all, Rod is a journalist and his coverage of the homosexual scandal was objective, accurate and thorough. This is evidenced by his use of precise journalistic terms such as "host" and "legion" when discussing the number of bishops involved and his steadfast refusal to reveal even more horrors in order to protect his sources. Why should we believe him? Because is a journalist in the United States of America, that's why.

    And as to the patsy and bully who has finally had the good grace to shuffle off his mortal coil, well, the evil that men do lives after them, the good is oft interred with their bones. So let it be with Neuhaus."

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  3. LOL, yes, Roland de Chanson is wonderful, inn't he? I wish we could entice him over here. But I've no idea who he is or how to contact him.

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  4. I haven't commented either.

    It just confirms what we know already -- that Mr. Dreher loses all perspective when writing about the sex scandal. It's kind of unfortunate. He is willing to believe (and pass on) almost anything that fits into the narrative of wicked priests and bishops, and Catholics who would rather bury their heads in the sand than confront evil, and him as the lone voice in the wilderness fighting against them.

    In reality, we're all a mix of good and bad -- priests, bishops, laity, reporters.

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  5. I guess we can be glad we haven't been treated to a Christopher Hitchens anti-obit (yet).

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  6. It just confirms what we know already -- that Mr. Dreher loses all perspective when writing about the sex scandal.

    Very true, and I think you'd still be close to the truth if you left off the last four words.

    Given that, and once the call of "Foul!" has been registered, the best way to honor Fr. Neuhaus's memory vis-a-vis Rod would be to [continue to] pray for him.

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  7. Yeah, I get a kick out of Roland.

    Rod just doesn't realize what a useful idiot he is to the enemies of Christianity. His insinuation that no Catholics cared about the scandal except for a few heroes, like him, fits perfectly into their belief system. To Rod and those like him, it doesn't matter how much any Catholic lamented, prayed and sacrificed over the horrible sex abuse scandal; if he or she didn't do it publicly in front of television cameras it didn't count. That goes double for bishops, obviously.

    This is how the left is in general. Religious conservatives are said to not care about the poor because we are against big gov't spending programs. But as Arthur Brooks has demonstrated, we outgive liberals by a wide margin. However, because we do not sound a trumpet when we give alms, it has become accepted that liberals are the generous ones and we are stingy old buzzards. We'd be more respected if we ignore Christ's admonition and brought out a brass band for each charitable occasion.

    It's possible that Rod Dreher doesn't really care much about the abuse scandal, nor the victims nor the damage done, at least not anymore. It seems like he left the church because he was personally embarrassed by being a Catholic amongst his media colleagues who gleefully hoped for the Catholic collapse which is a favorite theme in Crunchyland. He's "dining out" on the scandal at this point, just like the "Judas Priests" he attacks. At least this is how he comes across as he descends rapidly into the depths of caricature.

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  8. Pauli, re your final paragraph: I agree completely. I could be very wrong, of course, but, frankly, I do not think Rod gives a hoot about the victims. I think that "concerned father" shtick is a pose. If he cared so much about sex abuse and its victims, then he would be equally exercised over the incidence of sex abuse in the public schools, which is apparently much higher than the incidence in any church or communion. Moreover, if he really cared about sex-abuse victims, he would also show a tad more concern about the kids who have been molested by the Blanco monks; about the nun raped and stabbed more than a hundred times in a now-Orthodox monastery; about the altar boys raped by certain Greek Orthodox priests (still being protected by their metropolitan); about the wild sexual escapades of some of his own OCA hierarchs [substantiated stories reported in the Orthodox and secular press, BTW]; etc. etc. The extreme selectiveness of Rod's indignation belies his claims of compassionate concern.

    I agree with Tom that the proper response is to pray for Rod -- which I do, regularly. But pointing out his lies is necessary, too. I have known credulous Catholics who have been swayed by his mendacious arguments. Souls are at stake.

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  9. I'm willing to accept the grand narrative -- that what Mr. Dreher found out in his investigation of the scandals so scandalized him that it reduced his relationship with the Church to where it is now. I am also not eager to see Mr. Dreher repeat this experience with his new communion, even if its faults are as bad or more dramatic than ours.

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  10. You're a better man than I am, Gunga John! I confess that I remain skeptical. Baaaad baaaaad me! ;)

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  11. Re: John's excellent point about Rod being scandalized: it's difficult for me to imagine getting scandalized about the sins of people in the hierarchy. From Judas to Ananias to the Renaissance popes to the crazy priests of the 1960's plus everything imagined by Graham Greene, there's enough in history and fiction to prepare anyone for the worst kind of behavior from Catholic leaqders. And if I ever forget any of it, I've got Protestant relatives to remind me.

    Coupled with this I have my own past. I'm not guilty of all the stuff these priests did because I'm not a queer, but I'm plenty guilty of things that are pretty bad. Many are incredulous about this and since I'm not going to share details, they may remain so. But my guess is that my past is worse than Rod's and that my conversion was a greater mercy.

    When I was converting I heard a priest discussing how priests must realize when they come into a new church that there are many lay people who are holier than they are. This was a traditionalist priest, in other words, this is OLD wisdom in the Catholic church, not something birthed by Vatican II reforms. I think there is a humility among the good clergy which is summarized in that statement. Obviously the skeptical see this humility as an attempt to let themselves off the hook.

    So maybe I should cut Rod a break in this. It just seems to me like Jesus busted his nuts to prepare his people for scandals and some folks still didn't get the memo.

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  12. eh, it's not about the catholic church for Rod. it's about himself, his own career, his wanting people to like him. the guy never made it out of adolescence (see the followup to the Neuhaus post where he gushes about his ipod selections and asks people to post their favorite playlists for roadtrips. I mean, really). He can't see past his own nose and it makes him a moral idiot. anything he is involved with is golden automatically. it's embarrassing that someone like him should be taken at all seriously, by anyone. there are time when the guy really does seem to understand that there's something deeply and profoundly wrong with him, but it's not something he has any intention of ever dealing with. he's having too much fun with himself in his little fantasy world.

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  13. "Scandals will come...wheat and tares." Yep, Jesus could not have been much clearer if He had written it in giant glittery letters across the sky. Purists still haven't received the memo, as you note, but then that's the purist shtick. With all due respect to my Protestant brethren, such chimerical purism is a quintessentially Protestant phenomenon. Rod can have smells and bells till his eyes bubble; he's still a Protestant at heart.

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  14. eh, it's not about the catholic church for Rod. it's about himself, his own career, his wanting people to like him....

    Kathleen, I pretty much agree, but I'll add that it seems like to Rod's mind the Catholic church posed a big threat to Rod's popularity, possibly even his career. He also had to have noticed at some point that the Church fails to meet the crunchy qualifications of being small and local.

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  15. "He also had to have noticed at some point that the Church fails to meet the crunchy qualifications of being small and local."

    LOLOL! Well, if that's his criterion, then may I suggest The House of a Delivered Praise here in Winston-Salem? As far as I can tell, this church consists of precisely one storefront location. You can't get much more small and local than that, can you? ;-)

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  16. "it seems like to Rod's mind the Catholic church posed a big threat to Rod's popularity, possibly even his career."

    Yeah, there's definitely something going on there, like the beef he has with the church is personal. of course while he was catholic i'm sure he considered himself way more catholic than thou (running across a courtyard to kiss a cardinal's ring, anyone?). I guess now he's compensating for the initial overidentification -- not with a maturation process, like most, rather by choosing an alternate sphere with which to overidentify.

    Interesting that to let himself be identified with anything less than perfect is intolerable to him.

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  17. I am also not eager to see Mr. Dreher repeat this experience with his new communion, even if its faults are as bad or more dramatic than ours.

    John: Don't you think such a dose of reality might impel Dreher back home to Rome? His defection can hardly be safe for his soul -- and it's certainly not safe for the souls of his family members and others whom he influences.

    As long as he can convince himself that he's found some sort of purist shangri-la in his new communion, he can insulate himself against the reality that We Are All Sinners (including himself), which is the delusion that keeps him in a state of spiritually perilous schism.

    And, as I've said before, it's not just about Dreher. I find it hard to believe that anyone reads him anymore, but apparently some people do, including some Catholics, and his relentless Catholic-Bashing does influence them. I know of such cases.

    It's not that I want him to bash his new communion. I just want him to STOP bashing his old one, which happens to be mine. And given his obsessiveness, I doubt he will ever let up on the Obsesso-Catholic-Bashing until he has been knocked off his horse, so to speak, by some shock such as the revelation that his new cronies are even more corrupt than his old ones.

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  18. I suspect that immersing himself in the scandals of the Orthodox Church would be more likely to lead Dreher(and his family) completely away from Christ, rather than back to Rome.

    From what I've read, it seems that Dreher is aware that his new communion has its share of scandals, but he has made a conscious decision not to get too close to them in order to avoid a similar falling out. I don't blame him.

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  19. Fine, John. Then why does he keep on obsesso-bashing the Catholic Church? If he honestly does not want to revisit all that scandal stuff, why is he soooo selective in his application of this resolve? Does that not strike you as problematic?

    Is it too much to expect him to MOVE ON -- truly move on -- if moving on is what he professes to want to do? Is it too much to expect him to just leave us Catholics the heck alone? If he cannot return to the fold, can he at least stop spraying poison gas on it?

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  20. Addendum: I'm sorry, but I am unwilling to cut him that kind of slack. Like Pauli, I feel sorry for the guy, but OTOH I do not see that his multiple personal "issues" give him license to treat his fellow human beings with vicious nastiness. Having been on the receiving end of his vicious nastiness, I have frankly had it. As Mr. Bottum apparently can testify, Rod seems to operate on the assumption that no one has feelings but himself.

    Haven't we all known people like that -- people for whom we feel sorry; people who have been severely bruised by life and who therefore elicit our sympathy and compassion; people, however, whose actions we cannot therefore excuse? No amount of hard knocks justifies the victim in lashing out with vicious cruelty at everyone else. Many people have had rough childhoods or whatever, but not all of them go on to become nasty misanthropes or worse.

    The guy is a mean cuss who has amply demonstrated what Elizabeth Bennett called a callous disregard for the feelings of others. As Elisabeth says in a similar connection, I could more easily forgive *his* pride if he had not wounded mine.

    Justify him all you want; the fact remains that his problems and issues do not justify his cruelty toward others.

    Sorry if that sounds (and is) unChristian. I very very seldom visit his sorry little blog, but on the rare occasions that I do I am always shocked afresh by his nastiness. I guess I'm still a bit in shock.

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  21. And BTW, while we're on the subject: ISTM that Dreher is the sort of slimy opportunist who apologizes only to those whose good opinion is essential to his own interests, e.g., his career. If one is just an anonymous schmoe who cannot help him or further his interests in any way, then he apparently considers himself perfectly free to lob all the poisonous little insult-grenades his little heart desires.

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  22. I suspect that immersing himself in the scandals of the Orthodox Church would be more likely to lead Dreher(and his family) completely away from Christ, rather than back to Rome.

    From what I've read, it seems that Dreher is aware that his new communion has its share of scandals, but he has made a conscious decision not to get too close to them in order to avoid a similar falling out. I don't blame him.


    I don't blame him either.

    Daniel Nichols from the Caelum et Terra blog has speculated at least several times that Rod Dreher will end up becoming a Muslim. I think that's a bit silly, but possible if he continues to follow the path of emotion and illogic. I think--I hope--that rather he matures and decides that all his ranting and raving was misguided, ineffective and counterproductive, and that cooler heads (like Fr. Neuhaus et al) are needed in a crisis situation in addition to fist-pounders.

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  23. "I suspect that immersing himself in the scandals of the Orthodox Church would be more likely to lead Dreher(and his family) completely away from Christ, rather than back to Rome."

    Then what you are saying is you don't really believe he is a Christian. I'm not arguing with that point, btw.

    and yeah, yeah, arguably none of us is truly christian, blah blah blah. but i, for one, have not taken a truly grievous church scandal and exploited it as an opportunity to persuade myself and others of my own cleanliness. this guy idolizes his own religious experiences, his own conscience, and the more he insists on doing so (and boy, does he insist) the further he gets away from Christianity. and in my opinion he was quite far in the first place.

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  24. Thank you, Kathleen. My sentiments exactly.

    If a penchant for truly nasty insults is a prime Christian virtue, well, I must have missed that part of the Gospel.

    And boy, that goes double for some of the Dreherite acolytes. They really make Holy Orthodoxy seem overwhelmingly attractive to me...NOT.

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  25. And re the Scandal: It has been TWO flippn' years since Dreher left the Catholic Church. TWO, count 'em, TWO. It is time for him to give it a rest already.

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  26. Well, I wish he would too, but now I think it's a matter of not being able to unsee what he's seen. He sees a bishop on TV saying something he doesn't want to hear, and his mind flashes back to bishops covering up sexual abuse, and that's the funhouse mirror in which he sees the Church and Catholics.

    Yes, it's partly his fault he's there, and it's his reponsibility to get himself out, and there is the real possibility he could lead some souls astray into thinking that covering up for sexual abuse if as much a part of Catholicism as abstaining from meat on Lenten Fridays, but I don't know what I can do (other than prayer) to bring that change about.

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  27. well, what you could do is call a spade a spade. i must admit i find male catholic types a bit too gentlemanly when confronted with real assholes. dreher is a real toxic menace who's parading around his Christianity as a bulletin point on his resume.

    jody bottum's wimpy paragraph is an excellent example of what i'm talking about. "Dreher was a lousy friend to me and that casts his points about Neuhaus in doubt." give me a freakin break! dreher is a moral idiot, a contemptible freak, and more people need to come out and say as much without couching everything in faux charity or coating every point with a gooey intellectual veneer. it's so unmasculine.

    i hope Neuhaus did prevail upon Buckley, or whoever, to get Dreher to stop writing about the scandal. I can't imagine why anyone of good faith would find it disturbing if Neuhaus did exactly that.

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  28. He sees a bishop on TV saying something he doesn't want to hear, and his mind flashes back to bishops covering up sexual abuse, and that's the funhouse mirror in which he sees the Church and Catholics.

    But there is still that ****double standard**** -- and that's what I can't get past. He knows darned well that it's no different in his own communion. If anything, it's worse, and believe me, I'm not kidding about that. So, when he sees that Catholic bishop on TV, his mind should also flash to some of the truly, truly HORRIBLE stuff (I will not be explicit because this is a family forum) going on **not only in his own communion** but in his own diocese and under the very nose of his own hierarch.

    Instead, all we get is how Gandalfian and "lovely" said hierarch supposedly is. IOW: naive credulity toward his new communion; rabid hatred and rage toward his old one. I cannot justify this. It is sick and evil.

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  29. Thank you, Kathleen! LOL, we harpies (wasn't that Dreher's lovely epithet for us?) gotta stick together.

    Gentlemen: Now you see why the Iroquois women were reportedly the cruelest tormentors of the poor schlemiel (Huron, perhaps, or Jesuit) who was being forced to run the gauntlet. LOL!

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  30. "i must admit i find male catholic types a bit too gentlemanly when confronted with real assholes."

    I agree. And you know what? I find it a tad unchivalrous, also. C'mon, guys, how about sparing some of that compassion and sympathy for some of Dreher's *victims*? What are we--chopped liver? Is it OK to make every darned excuse for Dreher while he goes on his merry way treating human beings like pond scum--and yet refuse to see the perspective of the folks who have been treated like pond scum? ;-)

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  31. You realize who you're sounding like, don't you?

    Here's hint

    I can understand why people would find Dreher's double standards, etc. angering. I do, too. But ultimately, stoking our anger at this is as impotent as following Dreher's invocations to stoke our anger over the sexual abuse scandals.

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  32. i'm not stoking my anger. my anger is stoked. it has been stoked for about 3 years. does that mean i obsess about dreher, and think of nothing else? does it mean i read his blog everyday? does it mean i think about him everyday or even every month? NO. what it does mean is that i recognize him for what he is, namely a phony who sounds right enough of the time to be genuinely dangerous and appalling. Dangerous not least to himself. if the guy continues to idolize his own self-perceived righteousness, then my offense continues to exist.

    i might sound like dreher, but i'm not like him. and i aspire to be nothing like him.

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  33. PS: anger is not impotence. you are confused.

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  34. Kthleen, hear hear.

    I will go farther. I **NEVER** give Dreher a passing thought **except** on those occasions when it is called to my attention that he has been viciously bashing my Church again.

    When this happens, I am usually in shock -- yet again -- that he is still at it, and just as hatefully / evilly as ever. I guess I am naive. I have a hard time believing that a self-professed Christian can behave so evilly. It always takes me by surprise and throws me fo a loop.

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  35. i'm not stoking my anger. my anger is stoked. it has been stoked for about 3 years.

    Just like Dreher (though his anger has been stoked for about 6 years, at least).

    It's also just like Dreher to call those who aren't as belligerent as you want them to be "unmasculine" (his preferred expression back in the day, maybe still, was "men without chests").

    On the plus side, you haven't started name-dropping or lauding imported butter.

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  37. Freud said "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" Likewise, sometimes unmasculine is just unmasculine.

    Dreher's anger initially had a point. and I agreed with him fully -- I still do -- that far too many catholics exhibited far too little anger about the scandal. but that makes his coopting of the matter as his own little hobby horse even worse.

    I remain unimpressed, and unintimidated, by your intimations.

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  38. PS: are you serious? it's bad to be angry about something long term? is this the "My Little Pony" school of why can't we just all get along catholicism?

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  39. For the record, I would never dream of impugning anyone's masculinity.

    Chivalry, maybe?

    Chivalry is in short supply these days, even in Real Life. On the Internet -- including the religious Internet -- it seems to be non-existent.

    If Rod ever said to me face to face, in Real Life, the things he has said to and about me on the Internet, my DH would punch his lights out. Seriously.

    Look, guys. What is so hard to understand about this? Why is all the empathy reserved for Dreher? Why not spare just an eensy-weensy bit of sympathy and understanding for those whom he has targeted for public defamation? Like so many denizens of cyberspace, the guy's a glorified Playground Bully. Since when do the Playground Bullies warrant the kid-glove treatment? How about the people they've just bloodied?

    His own erstwhile friend, Joseph Bottum, testifies that Dreher's nastiness hurt him deeply. News flash: It's not just Relatively Famous People who have feelings and who get hurt by bullying and nastiness. We obscure peons are just as susceptible -- and just as fed up with the crap. "When you prick us, do we not bleed?"

    I have even semi-seriously considered consulting my attorney to see if any of Dreher's vicious public misrepresentations of me (by name) qualify as libel. I am not a public figure; I have no journalistic pulpit from which to defend myself against his slurs and smears. Isn't that why libel laws were passed in the first place -- to protect ordinary citizens from being defamed by a drunk-with-power press?

    Look at what Dreher did to Jonathan Carpenter. No matter what you may feel about Jonathan's methods, Dreher was beyond savage in his treatment of the guy. At what point, as Kathleen says, do you start calling a spade a spade? At what point does despicable behavior warrant being called what it is -- despicable?

    Bottom line: Y'all who are so quick to jump on Kathleen and me because we are upset with Dreher...please consider sticking up for us for a change. Dreher's a human being, but so are we. Please give us the same consideration yo0u would give Dreher...OK?

    Thanks!

    Diane

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  40. Another thing: It is simply absurd to compare Kathleen and me to Rod. Are we journalists? Do we spend our days, morn till night, hectoring and exhorting the Benighted Masses from our journalistic Bully Pulpits? Have we spent much of the past six or seven years publicly savaging countless bishops, priests, and laypeople for refusing to Share Our Level of Outrage? No. We are two obscure laypeople who spend the bulk of our time -- BY FAR -- raising our kids, doing our jobs, and going about our business.

    In short: apples and oranges.

    Diane

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  41. Y'all who are so quick to jump on Kathleen and me because we are upset with Dreher....

    Diane, say who you mean by "y'all". I've defended you and Kathleen AND J-Carp vis-a-vis Dreher many a time. The only reason I say let's take a breather is sometimes I feel like we're hitting the "All-things-are-lawful-but-not-all-things-are-profitable" wall.

    The reason I almost got a sick feeling reading Dreher's stuff last night and the comments is that he does make Christianity look horrible and a system with no internal logic. You attack a dead man in print then, instead of apologizing, you say "the devil made me do it plus I got this weird austistic thing--I just can't help it." Well, Mr. No-self-control, maybe a few priests have a weird "the devil made us sodomize boys" thing and they can't help it.

    But seriously this guy along with David Kuo and Jim Wallis--two more moral idiots--and others like them represent the Christian press online.

    I'm just saying it makes me sick and I don't really know what to do about it. I could scream and throw my kids stuffed animals and wave my arms around, but I don't think that would do any good. I could go to the range and shoot guns, but I was going to do that anyway....

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  42. Re: libel, I think libel cases are hard to prove because they can't just be about name-calling, but actual accusation. It can't just come down to an opinion, but a deliberate distortion of a truth known by the other party.

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  44. Pauli, I should have specified that I was not including you in the "y'all." Because I wasn't. Not even close. Am not just saying this to suck up; I mean it 100%. I have manifold and egregious faults, but dishonety's (usually) not one of them.

    Re Kathleen's last sentence: Amen--preach it sister! That's the issue in a nutshell.

    I am sorry this has become heated.

    I agree that I do not have a legal case re libel, and I wouldn't press one anyway. But I can't help thinking, How can Dreher get away with that? How can he trash people, impugn their sanity, and defame them publicly--and get away with it? If there isn't a law, there should be!

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  45. 1. The first claim on my chivalry goes to my wife and two daughters. Then my mother and grandmother. Then to other women and children I know.

    I'm afraid that near-strangers on the internet who go into the comment boxes of a writer they consider to be a jerk and are treated jerkily will have to get in line.

    2. I have not attacked anybody here. I have questioned the prudence of this course of commentary, and pointed out its similarity to the actions of the person so resented, and tried to bring about some understanding of where he's coming from. I have most certainly done nothing as objectionable as question anyone's manliness or chivarlry.

    3. When someone who called the target a 12-letter explitive is advising you to tone down the anger, it might be a sign that you've crossed the line from "righteous anger" to "self-serving, indulgent anger"

    Those will be my last words on the matter.

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  46. Re Pauli: The reason I almost got a sick feeling reading Dreher's stuff last night and the comments is that he does make Christianity look horrible and a system with no internal logic. You attack a dead man in print then, instead of apologizing, you say "the devil made me do it plus I got this weird austistic thing--I just can't help it."

    I was wondering what it is about Dreher that gets all of our danders up. Pauli's blog is relatively quiet, but then we have a Dreher-related post and blammy.

    And then Pauli nails it. It isn't so much that the crunchy One left our Church -- that happens all the time. It isn't so much that he is a conservative poser -- we've got plenty of those around, esp. in Congress.

    It is that he poses as a conservative somewhat-Orthodox Christian to the non-believing or fringe-believing "intellectual" world (think Franklin the pagan), and trashes the Church in front of them. (Ditto for conservative issues, but that hits a duller nerve.)

    As I wrote back at the time of the Great Orthodox Conversion, it was as though he tossed a stink bomb into a party that he just left. And then called a crowd outside the hose to watch the mayhem through the windows. We couldn't help but defend the Church, but to the outsiders, that defense couldn't help but appear ungracious at the least.

    And the pagans et al. think that Dreher himself plus the harsh words of the defenders are what the Church is all about. Either we are snobs who claim to care about Truth but will change our views for issue-convenience (Dreher) or we are just a bunch of touchy nutcases.

    As Pauli said -- we appear as believers in a system with no internal logic. And that unfair and incorrect appearance is not only annoying, but in fact is the deepest cut -- made by someone who should know better. That is what gets to me about him, anyway.

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  47. OK, John, I don't want to draw you back into this, but...

    1. What 12-letter expletive? (I think I missed that one.)

    2. Last time I checked, I thought chivalry was due to any woman. IOW, as Jonathan Prejean of *Crimson Catholic* once put it, there are certain things you simply do not say to a woman, period. I certainly am not saying that anyone here has said such things, but Dreher and his cronies certainly have, and I've seen precious few guys object. A few, yes, notably Pauli ad Roland de Chanson. But not too many. I am not taking you to task, John. I guess I am just a little disappointed that so much sympathy is extended to Dreher and so little to his targets. And no, we were not "asking for it." Internet discourse gets heated, but I have never seen anyone lob the kind of vitriol at Dreher that he and his chums routinely lob at other people. I could give some examples that would make your hair curl.

    But I'm tired of going around and around on this one. I'm willing to let it drop. Life is way too short.

    Thanks and God bless you!

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  48. pikku, thou hast touchd it with a needle.

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  49. diane, you are correct about chivalry. and let's not forget that we are all members of the same church and supposed to have each other's backs on some basic level.

    yeah, pikku, the problem with dreher is that he not so much dilutes his brands, as he poisons them. he did it to conservatism, and now he's doing it to Christianity.

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  50. Kathleen:

    That it's bad to be angry about something long term isn't from the "My Little Pony" school, but the Thomistic school, which follows Sts. Gregory of Nyssa and John Damascene.

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  51. oh spare me. so I guess I shouldn't have any "long term anger" about the molestation scandal either, eh Tom? Or the idiots on wall street? Jesus harbored zero anger after he was able to vent it by flipping a few tables? only short term anger is allowed?

    Anger doesn't impair my ability to function in the world and be happy. Maybe that's a difference between me and you, or at least me and the "thomistic school"

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