Monday, February 2, 2009

Them Perfidious Cathlicks

A commenter calling himself/herself "Cathlicks SHURE are dum" has a great response to Rod Dreher's latest Catholic bash which features hot chicks doing liturgical dance in a Cathlick church.

What an absurd post. The SSPX certainly was not created in reaction to and did not break away from the church over such liturgies.

Rod has explained time and again that he is by nature incapable of presenting a balanced picture of Catholicism. He is psychologically incapable of passing up any opportunity to make Catholics look foolish and backward (see, they're not only corrupt as in the previous post they are also a bunch of clowns). Therefore, there is absolutely no point in saying (as likely 99% of Catholics would truthfully say) that they have never once in their life encountered a liturgy like this one even one time in their life. Nor is there a point in explaining that there is a debate about the legitimacy of "inculturating" catholicism to embrace elements of cultures other than Western European ones. He don't care folks. He like to laugh at Catholics and deride their leaders. It's his shtick, and as he has explained many times, it's his blog. Therefore, just grin and nod and move on.

How grateful you must be to have joined a perfect Church Rod. And how grateful Catholics will be when you finally get over your need to continuously pat yourself on the back for your wise choice. You've left the Catholic Church, Rod. Congratulations. Now see if you can somehow let go of your need to continuously harp on its many, many, many failures. Then you will truly be free of its perfidious influence.

This brings up an interesting point to me. Maybe Dreher doesn't really have a problem with Catholics, but with "Cathlicks". Or possibly "Catlicks"? Maybe even "Ca'lix"? Which leads me to wonder, is Dreher an Orthodox or is he an "Ort'docks"?

But seriously, this response to Dreher's Catholic-bashing is the kind that I like the best. We could also read this, I suppose, for balance. But after numerous unanswered requests for suggestions of how exactly I should adequately express my rage over the sexual molestation of boys by perverted Catholic priests, I assume God is letting me off the hook regarding anger at perverted Orthodox priests.

When you don't have professional anger training and you're not naturally predisposed to wrath, face it―you're limited as to what you can do with or without the megaphone. Of course a lot has to do with how you answer this quiz question about what Christ suggested for getting out the most stubborn demons:

a) Prayer
b) Fasting
c) Getting really angry
d) A and B
e) All of the above

8 comments:

  1. Y'know, something occurred to me the other day, when I forwarded the story about the Orthodox archimandrite to Simple Sinner. As I observed to Simple, for years Rod has immersed himself in stories like that -- only when they involve Catholic clergy, of course, but still. He remains obsessively fixated on such stories. Yet, after reading that story about the Orthodox archimandrite, I felt like I needed brain bleach. I felt sick to my stomach. I imagine that is how most people would feel.

    OK, not to put too fine a point on it -- in fact, to be perfectly blunt -- what kind of person becomes obsessed with stories like this (albeit only when they involve Catholic clergy)? What kind of person goes out of his way to read -- to almost revel in -- story after story after story like this (providing it involves Catholics, that is)?

    I'm sorry, but there is something deeply, deeply unhealthy going on here.

    The lurid 19th-century "revelations" of Maria Monk have been aptly dubbed "Protestant pornography." Rod is the Maria Monk of the 21st century, and his fixations are no less pornographic, no less profoundly unhealthy. Just my two cents' worth.

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  2. Now he has updated his post by adding no less than THREE youtubes of (drum roll pls.......) CLOWN MASSES!!

    I agree, Diane. This is just classic anti-Catholicism, nothing more. You show all the warts and none of the good.

    The most laughable aspect of Rod Dreher's obsession is what appears to be his mawkish end-game, his conclusion to all of this, viz. the Catholic church needs to "get crunchy" like the Orthodox church to solve their problems. And that triteness falls like a sand castle as soon as you point out that they have the same problems in their church.

    As for what getting crunchy would entail, my best guess at this point is that it would involve a large degree of showiness, possibly a bishop or archbishop going on network television, publicly tearing his clothes and bursting into tears and promising vaguely that he would do everything in his power to "right the wrongs" committed.

    The question isn't whether this might be a good thing, but whether it's a necessary thing. I myself am overjoyed enough when I hear certain corrupt liberal goofballs got defenestrated from my diocesan chancery, something which rarely if ever receives press coverage, but which brings about more improvement than dog and pony shows.

    I'm not the first person to make this point about Dreher & the media.

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  3. What kills me is the Catholic sycophants who go along with Rod's obsesso-bashing. Granted, there are very few of said sycophants anymore, but the fact that there are any is kinda weird.

    Then there's Scott Walker -- "It's good to be Orthodox" -- yeah, methinks Mr. Our-Sh*t-Doesn't-Stink doth protest too much.

    BTW, can we invite Roland de Chanson over here? he is da bomb!

    Love,

    Diane

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  4. LOL, well, I commented at the Rod-Blog, and natch, Mr. Fearless Courageous Journalist deleted my post, but at least this time he didn't insult me in the process. Perhaps my threat of legal action had some effect. :)

    Here is my comment, saved for posterity:

    Well, I've been a Catholic most of my life, and I've lived all up and down the Eastern seaboard, yet for some strange reason I've never encountered the kind of silliness Rod so charitably and graciously spotlights here. Go figure.

    Occasionally the little old lady next to me may grab my hand during the Our Father, but silly me, I think she's just being sweet. Hey, how sick is that?

    Someone once said about rabid, obsessed Internet Anti-Catholics: "If there's a Clown Mass anywhere on planet earth, no matter how rare or remote the occurrence, these people will manage to ferret it out and present it as though it were representative of a typical Sunday in Catholic-Land." So true, so true, alas.

    Of course, Rod's Pure Little Church doesn't have to worry about such depredations. True, its entire active membership is under 50,000, which would tend to make purism a tad more attainable. (And yet this eensy little jurisdiction has been roiled by financial and sexual scandals -- go figure!)

    Just goes to show what I always say:

    It's easy to be "pure"

    When your church consists of four,
    
And one of them's your priest,

    And two others are deceased.

    It's easy to be "pure"

    When your church is quite obscure

    And insular and clannish,

    And nobody speaks Spanish.

    It's easy to be "pure" --

    But you'd best make extra sure!

    So, here's what you should do:

    Start a church confined to you.

    "Don't pinch it; it's copyright." -- Psmith in Leave It to Psmith

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  5. My latest at the Dreherrhea Blog. Catch it before it's gone, LOL.

    So, Clown Masses exist. On YouTube. Not in Real Life -- at least not in any Real Life any Real People I know actually, like, live. But Rod has to justify his latest obsessive Catholic-Bash at all costs, so that means scouring YouTube for "Evidence That Clown Masses Have Actually Occurred Sometime, Somehow, Somewhere."

    In Polyanna, Hayley Mills famously quoted Abe Lincoln: "If you look for the bad in people, you are surely going to find it."

    This pretty much works across the board. If you look for the bad in churches, you are surely going to find it, too. That goes for any church. Including Rod's. I guarantee that, if I looked for the bad in the OCA, I could find plenty and to spare.

    But cui bono? What is the point of looking for the bad -- and only for the bad? What is the point of searching high and low, of scouring the planet, until you find that one Clown Mass you can point to with derisive glee whilst congratulating yourself that you are not as that clownish publican over there?

    Sure, if you look hard enough and long enough and obsessively enough and relentlessly enough, you'll turn up a Clown Mass. Never mind that the vast majority of Catholics have never witnessed a Clown Mass. Never mind that most Catholics have never even heard of Clown Masses. When those who look for the bad in other people's churches really get going, they won't let a little thing like truth or honesty or fairness stand in their way.

    Looking for the bad in the Catholic Church--and ONLY for the bad--is the very definition of anti-Catholicism. It's also the definition of obsession.

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  6. Good show, Diane.

    In my ardent early days as a Catholic convert, I swore I never hold hands during the Our Father -- I mean the "Pater Noster", of course -- out of my serious attention to the rubrics of the Traditional Roman Rite. Not even with a hot chick. Then I was at my God-son's FHC, and a dear old Sister, who I'm sure possessed more holiness in her little toe than I have within my entire being, literally put my hand in a vise-grip for the duration of the prayer.

    Was this an example of me giving into modernity, or the Holy Spirit's idea of a gentle joke? I'll let the reader decide.

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  7. LOL, thanks, Pauli!

    I know hand holding during the Our Father isn't Liturgically Correct, and I have good fiends who refuse to do it. It's discouraged (although not forbidden) in our diocese. I could go either way, I guess. Sometimes I find it very powerful. Of course, it's also a great way to catch colds. :)

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  8. It takes about 20 seconds to say -- is that enough time for diseases to germinate?

    I refused to hold hands with this woman one time and she was obviously offended... she wouldn't even look at me during the SIGN OF PEACE! How ironic is that?

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